A WHOLE bunch of funnies!!!

• What's the best thing about Pagan friends? They worship the ground
  you walk on.
  
• Did you hear about the dyslexic devil worshipper? He sold his soul to
  Santa!
  
• "He is YOUR god, They are YOUR rules, YOU burn in Hell!"
  
• What do ya' call 13 Witches in a hot tub? - Self-Cleaning Coven
  
• Get a taste for religion, Lick a Witch!
  
• Please hold. All muses are busy right now, but your inspiration is
  important to us.
  
• Q: What kind of furniture does a Goddess worshipper prefer? A: Wicker
  
• Q: Why did the Wiccan novitiate give up pork? A: She thought the Rede
  said,"Chew what you will, but ham?--none."
  
• Please don't squeeze the shaman!
  
• Q: What is a witch's favorite snack? A: PAN pizza
  
• Q: What's a witch's favorite subject in school? A: SPELLing.
  
• WHY M&M'S ARE PAGAN:
  * MM = Merry Meet*
  Round shape for wheel of the year, cycle of seasons*
  Skins are different colors, but the inside is the same chocolate,
  because we
  are all related.*
  Associations with the colors:
  Red = South
  Green = West
  Dark Brown = North
  Yellow = East
  Orange = For the Solar God
  Light Brown = For the Earth Mother (Copper Woman)
  * Rotate the M & M:
  M = 13th letter of alphabet, and there are 13 witches in a coven
  3 = Triple Goddess, three phases of moon W = Witchcraft
  
• Sign in a Wiccan Bookstore: "No Shoplifting! Offenders will be
  Possessed! Second-time Offenders will be Re-Possessed!"
  
• A sign with a dagger on it in a bookstore: "Shoplifters will be
  merrily hacked to pieces!"
  
• How many Witches does it take to change a light bulb? Depends on what
  you want to change it into.
  
• Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
  
• If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy?
  
• Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.
  
• Heck is a place for people who don't believe in Gosh.
  
• WASP...We Are Sexy Pagans
  
• Witches do it in the moonlight
  
• Practice safe hex
  
• Q: What do you call a dating club for unattached Wiccans? A: Craft
  singles!
  
• The Mighty God Thor was riding across the skies on his fiery steed
  Pegasus. He raised his hammer and bellowed, "I'M THOR! I'M THOR!"
  Pegasus looked up at him and muttered, "You thoulda wore your
  thaddle, thilly."
  
• That was Zen; this is Tao.
  

BACK TO FUNNY INDEX